Dealing with the "OTHER" woman!

PART II

     After dealing with the grief of the betrayal, I think that the next steps that are made are crucial to the relationship and sets the tone for any future restoration of the relationship or lack there of!  It has been said so many times that women are so emotional and yes, we are emotional but that is the way we were wired.  Women are wired to desire love, while men are wired to desire respect.  Not saying that men don't need love as well; however respect is crucial to their pride.  

     A serious decision has to be made as to whether or not you want the relationship to be restored, and I am not one to tell someone to leave their spouse!  If at all possible, try to speak to your spouse because usually the cheating individual "feels" as if a need isn't being met.  Another important thing, please DO NOT begin to compare yourself to the "other" woman because looks are very, very deceiving!  Understand, if a woman is willingly in a relationship with a married man, there is definitely a character flaw somewhere inside of her.  Don't get into the arguing stage with your spouse about what does she have that I don't.  Entering into this type of conversation will drive a deeper wedge between you and your spouse as well as drive him into her arms.  If you are not ready to have a civil conversation, then don't!  Try not to push yourself too hard!!  Also, prayer is the most powerful weapon that you have.  Understand, God respects the sanctity of marriage, not adultery, I don't care how it may appear. 

     This next one might throw you a little bit but pray for her and the spirit that is driving her into this relationship and ask God to remove her out of your marriage.  Next, don't tell everyone that you run into about the discord in your relationship.  The reason that I say this is because people will always have an opinion, but they may not share your opinion.  Once friends and family get their say in the entire situation, it will make it that much harder to make a rational decision.  Also, if you decide to remain in the relationship the percentage of the other woman coming up in conversations and family members having negative feelings about either one of you increases drastically.

Have you ever experienced this situation?  If so, what did you do to work the situation out?  And, did it work for the good?